A woman can be many things at once.
She is beautiful, charming, cute, and proper.
Sometimes, she is opinionated, passionate, and strong-willed.
But, women are rarely described as someone strong, per se.
If someone daresay describe a woman who is strong, it is almost always followed by a string of reasons; of justifications. She is so strong for bearing the responsibilities of a young mother. She is strong for dominating a field full of men. She is strong for speaking up about her experiences of abuse.
Can’t a woman just be strong without any validation from the things she decides to do?
A woman is strong because she is a woman. A person who chooses to live out her individuality and personality much like any man can freely do.
Your nurturing personality makes you strong because you have the innate ability to care for other people. Even if it gets hard and demanding, you do it anyway because it’s how you show your love for the people you care about.
It isn’t easy to consistently care for others while maintaining your own life. And for a woman to selflessly care for others without thoughts of reward, that deserves a reward. A plaque, a sash, a bouquet of flowers, and all that jazz. But, your nurturing personality isn’t all that you are.
Your charming and bubbly personality makes you strong. The ability to maintain a positive outlook in life is not an easy feat. With all the negativity in the environment, it is easier to wallow in the negativity and let it swallow you whole. There are times when you consider it too. Trust me, we all do. But for women who somehow always find things to celebrate every day, their positive mindset is something they choose to do every day. Being an optimist is not shallow nor is it detached, it is a choice—maybe even a difficult one that she chooses every day. Your smiles, giggles, and belly laughter, however, aren’t all that you can offer, right?
The traits that define you as a woman make you strong. But somehow, we find it difficult to wrap it around our heads because, for so long, feminine traits are always equal with weakness and frailty. Society has molded the idea that women need men to be strong. That women, like vines, need to climb and grow on twigs and branches to bloom into something beautiful. But, what they do not know, vines grow and bear fruit just fine even without these branches and twigs that dictate the direction of their growth for them.
A woman’s strength lies in her choice. It is in her words and her actions.
Even if a woman’s body is built differently, it may be more supple in more places than others, but it is well-built and sturdy. It is built to endure and to carry strength in its different forms.
Your decision to focus on your career, to climb the ladder of success makes you strong. Regardless of what people say about your decision, you will always have the last say. You’ll hear an occasional “You’ll grow old and lonely if you don’t marry now.” as you continue to strive for your career. It might strike a chord or two, but who knows? At that moment, what you want and what you need to do matters. Sometimes, you might get a “Who will take care of you when you won’t have children?” from your closest family and friends. It can turn the gears in your head in a frenzy but, at the end of the day, breathe and evaluate what you want for yourself. Where is your personal compass pointing to and are you going in that direction?
Your decision to start a family and bear children is a decision that shows extreme strength and dedication. The process of getting pregnant and giving birth is already a matter of life and death yet some women believe that their mission in life is to be a mother. Creating and maintaining a household every day without fail requires a bottomless pit of patience and strength too. Never let anyone say that motherhood is an easy task. It is not and it never will be.
And you can always choose to be both. Heaps of struggles come with being a working mother. It requires extra effort and extra patience but it will be worth it, right?
A woman is strong because of who she is. Not because of what she does.
Strong women in history were labeled as strong and empowering because of what they did, of what they said, and what they believed and fought for. Strong women now are known to be strong because of what they can and are able to do.
But before you become strong, you are weak and frail and unaware. Being in that state brings beauty too. You are in a state where your only option is to learn more, strive more, and grow. You are in the perfect position to gain power and develop a stronger body, mind, and willpower.
Women who are strong took extra strides to achieve that title. However you look at it, women have more boundaries and stereotypes to break when they want to be strong. We break of years and years of tradition and belief that the only place for women is in the house and serving a family. We deconstruct beliefs that women prep themselves to look good for the sake of men. We break stereotypes and dangerous thinking that what we do are always for the sake of other people.
Again, the strength of a woman is in her choices.
You can take all the time you need to make the right choices for yourself. The decision to live up to expectations depends on you. What’s important is you made that decision yourself. In a world and in a life where almost anyone has something to say about you, don’t let them decide for you too.
Being strong is not as easy as 1, 2, and 3. You can’t just decide one night saying, I will be strong and fierce tomorrow. It takes a lot of courage and determination and a whole lot of mistakes and setbacks. But, one day, you’ll be at a point where you can look back and say that all of the experiences made you stronger.
When you were at a crossroads of choosing between which course to take, between the one you always wanted or the one the world expects from you. When you made a choice and stood up to it, it was a stepping stone for building your strength in making your life your own.
When you chose to lead your groupmates in creating a project rather than waiting for someone else to steer the wheel, that’s another block in making your life your own.
And when you chose to wake up today and live your life according to how you want it to be, it’s another step, another mile towards the direction that you have always wanted to follow.
The littlest things build up to something bigger. Both the easiest and hardest decisions you have ever made build your core strengths.
And as a woman, choosing to live your life as an unapologetic and carefree woman builds the strength of being you. You owe that to yourself.
You can be both warm yet stern.
You can be both sensitive and headstrong.
And, you can be prim and proper and brazen.
You can be all these things and more and yet still be strong.
A strong woman doesn’t have a single face. At each woman you look at, that is the face of a strong individual. Of a person who is trying their hardest to become firm and strong and powerful.
Whatever kind of woman you are right now, you can be so much more.
Gain the strength that you need and want from the little and drastic decisions you make everyday.
You are growing and you are getting stronger everyday.